The Four-sides model (“Hamburger Modell”) by Friedemann Schulz von Thun is in every German textbook on communication. It states that every message has 4 levels:
- Factual information
Facts and data
What the sender (speaker) wants to happen
- Self revelation
What the sender reveals about themselves – motives, values, emotions
How sender and receiver (listener) get along; what the sender thinks of the receiver
With these levels in mind we can have more constructive discussions.